Its taken thirteen years for me to have a full on relapse I had all the usual bit from loss of sight to weak limbs, when necessary I would use iv steroids to try and speed up the recovery but this time my immunity is well and truly screwed after the eight weeks on Oxy. If I was to use the iv steroids at the moment I don’t think this worn out body could handle them.
I tried really hard to get out today it took two hours to have a shower and get dressed, I was so fecked by the time I reached the car I was only fit to drop into dunnes and send hubby on a supermarket sweep to get something in for dinner.
I have overcome this bastard disease by refusing to accept it and get better as soon as physically possible, not this time getting showered and dressed is like climbing a mountain I am weak and exhausted all of the time. I went into Twist soup kitchen the other day to try and do a recording for citizen Irish my youtube channel. I was delighted to see that there was no one there as I did not have the energy to speak let alone interview people.
So this is the big one the relapse I have always dreaded and hoped would never happen to me, I know this has happened as a direct result of the stress I was under recently. I had to take on the might of the HSE and thanks to the assistance I received from Sinn Fein; I did get my treatment for the chronic nerve pain after eight weeks on the heavy stuff which I believe caused the perfect storm for the MS to attack. I couldn’t eat for days at a time and was living on tea, oxy and morphine. Every day I fell deeper into the abyss I am now living in and the really sick thing about this is it was all avoidable.
My nerve pain will return in five weeks and I don’t have a follow up appointment the pain clinic so the fight may begin again very soon. My friends on twitter and facebook kept me sane their support enabled me to fight, I may be asking for their help again in five weeks.
Our health service is inhumane surely there is a possibility I could be taken in for a few days and get the immunity built up? which would allow me to use the steroids and be in with a fighting chance. I refuse to accept that this is it, a lifetime of education and employment is desperate to get out in the world again even if I have to do it in a wheelchair so be it because this bastard disease won’t stop me living a productive life.
grumpyirishwoman 
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